So much for a peaceful day!

Just before the Apes left for work, the neighbour from next door drops in saying he has to go out of town for the rest of the week. Could we look after his dog?

Without delay, the Apes accepted the mutt, saying it would be fine. Arching my back and hissing, "No!" didn’t seem to help in the Apes decision at all. Sometimes I get the feeling the Apes think they own the place, but in actual fact it’s mine. (I marked it myself!) I just let them stay here; a situation I may have to correct if they keep pulling stupid crap like this.

I took one look at this mixed breed mutt and knew there was going to be problems. The Apes could have at least tied it up outside, but no! Apparently this is an "indoor" dog. It only goes outside to leave tightly coiled steam lumps on the front yard. It doesn’t even bury them. Barbaric creature!

The Apes weren’t five minutes out the door, and this mutt had eaten all my food. Great! Another day of starvation. When you have input, you also have output. The damned thing crapped on the carpet shortly after. Now I’m hungry and nauseous.

I guess after all that good food, it got a burst of energy and decided I was something to chase around and play with. This lasted a total of 2 seconds. It spent an hour after that cowering in the corner nursing a very deep wound on the tip of its nose. What a wimp!

It’s currently sitting here beside the chair watching me type; panting like it just ran a marathon. I think it’s trying to communicate, but all I’m getting from it is, "Duh…" I’m beginning to think inbred retardation might be a factor here.

Then again, any dog will perform fetching a stick over and over, so none of them can be all that bright. If an Ape throws something away, they likely don’t want it. Why would you keep bringing it back? But if the Ape repeatedly throws it away, knowing the mutt will just bring it back, then he’s likely slightly dumber than the dog.

I say, try this with a stick of lit dynamite. Problem solved at both ends!