In my pursuit of something good to read, I came across one of The Wet One’s children’s book called, “The Three Little Pigs” A terrifying read of a Wolf who’s stalking three little piglets.

I fell asleep just before getting to the end which inspired a dream…

{… Knowing the Big Bad Wolf was close, Gorgeous puts the finishing touches on his Straw House. “That should keep him out” thinks Gorgeous.

Suddenly out of the trees, the Wolf approaches. “Little kit, little kit, let me in!”

“Not by the fur on my chinny chin chin!” Gorgeous replies.

“I’m gonna huff and puff and blooow your house down!” (What a hot head!)

“Now that’s just ridiculous! How can a Wolf blow a… err… that is…” Gorgeous is suddenly very aware that he’s now standing in the middle of what seems like a hurricane; walls and ceiling crashing down around him.

Later, Gorgeous finishes driving the last nail into his Wooden House. “Let’s see that big ball of wind blow this one down!”

Long story short, the Wooden House suffers the same fate as the Straw House. This Wolf should get a job inflating Zeppelins!

Later again, Gorgeous puts the finishing touches on his Brick House. Satisfied, he decides to catch a quick nap before the Windy Wolf appears again. He’s just about to jump into the bed when he notices it’s occupied… by a Wolf dressed in granny bed cloths.

“Hey! You’re not Little Red Riding Hood!” exclaims the wolf.

“You moron!” Gorgeous retorts. “You’re in the wrong story! You’re supposed to be outside trying to blow this house down!”

“I retired from that story. Why would I blow down a brick house when the back door was wide open? Besides, I thought it would be more fun to dress in Granny Drag and scare children.” the Wolf explains.

Gorgeous smiles uneasily then tosses the house keys to the Wolf. “Knock yourself out then, you fanged freak!” says Gorgeous while slowly backing out of the house…}

Remind me in the future to never read “Pet Cemetery” before bed…