It’s getting to the point where a Cat simply cannot lounge in a tree without a bunch of Apes making a big fuss. Is it a crime for a Cat to be in a tree? It’s certainly looking that way.

Last week I climbed 3 trees. You know, just a place to chill out and maybe munch on a bird or two.

Each time, the same thing happened. Some stupid Ape would come along, notice me, and say, “Look at that poor Kitty stuck in the tree!” This was shortly followed by the arrival of neighbours, police and firemen determined to get me down.

Stuck in the tree, my ass! I climbed it, and I can certainly get down from it! Why can’t they just let me enjoy my day?

The joke was on them each time. I’d wait until ladders were extended, and blankets were deployed for me to jump into. Just as the firemen got close enough to grab me, I’d turn, climb down the tree, then head home with the sounds of “Stupid Cat!” ringing in my ears.

Stupid, huh? I’m not the one who called every rescue unit in the area for nothing!

In light of this, I now only climb trees for sport; just to see how long it takes for the Apes to “rescue me!”