Well! This is just great! The Apes are packing up all their stuff and moving out. At first I was all excited that they would vacate and leave the house to me. As it turns out this is not the case at all! They intend to take me with them.

Do you have any idea how long it took me to get this place to smell just right? I’m talking gallons of ‘spray’ and endless amounts of claw scratching here! I even had to work around and overpowering pungent stink of ScapeGoat The Dog. Not an easy task by any means! Four years of hard labour down the drain!

Now I’ll have to start all over. It’s going to be even harder this time to put down a good base coat of spray now that I’ve been fixed. Takes twice as much to leave my mark now. The Apes had better keep my water bowl full in the new place because I’ve got a lot of work ahead of me.

Then they add insult to injury. They bring out the ‘Cat Carrier’ so that I can get ‘used to it’ being around for move day.

Listen you overgrown primates! I will NEVER get used to that thing! My first experience with it was CASTRATION! What? You’d think I’d forgotten about that? I know when that thing comes out, something is about to be taken from me. In this case, it’s going to be my home!

Oh, and by the way… If you don’t want us playing in the boxes, stop filling them with fun stuff like:

• Packing peanuts (Which really aren’t peanuts I found out. I puked snowballs for hours!)
• Bubble Wrap (Pop-ity Pop! Pop! Whoo Hoo!)
• Crinkly paper (You’re just teasing us with that one.)
• Your Stash (But it just smells sooo damned good!)
• Important papers and documents (Level of fun is directly proportional to how important the papers are.)

Once thing is for sure. If I don’t like the new place… join me next month for the commencement of ShredFest 2010 when they try to unpack all this stuff!